Learning to Go at the Pace of My Body

I’ve been living in my head a lot recently, noticing the pace of thoughts and the compulsive push of my mind to ideate, explore, and create. Because my mind is pushing in this direction, a direction that is generally approved of and celebrated, and which inspires me and feeds my insatiable curiosity, it is easy to let it commandeer my deeper embodied knowing - that allowing my mind to run the show pulls me into old patterns of disconnecting from my felt experience and leads to burnout.

It used to be that when I felt disconnected from the world, I would attribute the disconnection to external circumstances. However, in the last several years I’ve become aware that feelings of disconnection arise when I disconnect within myself and from my body. This most often surfaces when my mind takes the lead and runs roughshod over my body dismissing my body’s guidance to meet the world at a slower pace.

A mentor and I were discussing a complex and challenging cultural situation that exists in our country and how to move toward healing the wounds, and she said, “We have to go at the pace of people.” What came to me this morning as an important addition to this statement, we must go at the pace of people, and, people must go at the pace of their bodies.

We must go at the pace of people and people must go at the pace of their bodies.

Bodies know the pace needed to work through things. 

We are meant to experience the world through our bodies first. We are meant to process our experience through our physicality and if there is no space to let our experience be felt, it gets stored in our nervous systems, often as trauma (an unprocessed experience that did not have time or space to complete and heal).

In recent history, the mind has been falsely elevated to the status of Supreme Ruler. In practice, our mind is our clever, curious, attendant - a loyal capable partner who can translate, problem-solve, ideate, and dream. As a pair, they are nearly unstoppable, but when the mind overthrows the body, things fall apart. The evidence is everywhere, look at the news.

This week I’ve been reminded of this fact. 

I’ve been feeling the disconnection and the compulsive drive to push forward, along with the accompanying resentment that surfaces when my mind overrides my body. I’m changing my approach as we speak, bringing my body back into the lead. 

Writing this piece I feel the deliberate slowness of my typing and the words flowing from my fingers. The out-breath of my lungs encourages the release of tension in my shoulders and neck. I notice the grounded weightiness of my butt in the seat and the gentleness with which I stroke each key as my fingers move across the keyboard. There is a difference when my body leads. I am more connected to the language, guidance, and wisdom of my body and less dominated by the frenetic sparks of ideas bursting in my mind. My mind’s popcorn pace doesn’t cease, it just quiets and is in the background rather than the lead.

Connection within myself is occurring and available now.

When I feel disconnected, my mind wants to fly through all the ways it can fix the feeling. It seeks external additions to the situation, looking for what more I need to feel a connection. Yet it is a slowing of the mind and settling into a dialogue with my body than is being asked for. 

Connection is first about belonging within myself, slowing to the pace of my body. It arises from honouring her wisdom. 

It used to be that I had no time for my body, no time to listen, no patience to slow down and wait for her to speak. As a member of our culture, raised to believe that intellect was the highest order of human achievement, it has taken much tending and attending to my body to be aware of how simple it is to feel connected. 

So I do that now. 

I Stop.

I Breathe.

I feel the sensations without labeling or making meaning of them.

I listen to the wisdom of my physical vessel.

And she thanks me.

How does that feel?

What happens when your mind runs away with your body? How does it feel? How does this show up in your daily life?

Photo by Katsiaryna Endruszkiewicz on Unsplash